When you ask a stay at home mother or father what they do during the day, there's a 98% chance that you're going to get a snide comment involving soap operas and Bon Bons hurled at you. While nothing could be further from the truth, I also think there are some days that nothing could be closer to the truth. Before you stone me with your Bon Bons of bias, hear me out. While I recognize that the list of shit required of us on a daily basis is lengthy and tedious, I also admit that I am not above ignoring said list when the mood suits me, which is not an option when you're working a nine to five. It was in the high 70's this entire week and I am not ashamed to say that I left a dirty toilet, a pile of dishes and a mound of laundry in lieu of enjoying the sunshine with my kids, again not an option when you're commuting to the office everyday. My friend Kate would say each choice has its challenges and she would be right. She is an amazing woman, who works full time days and conducts international conference calls after she's served out her nightly mommy duties...so there's that. I'd say her challenges outweigh mine and I'm saying that in all sincerity. Everyone has days they just don't want to do it anymore regardless of their place of employment. And again, I'm not belittling the challenges and responsibilities involved in the path I've chosen. I work damn hard whether I'm preparing a meal, struggling to get a squirming toddler into her diaper or sitting on the floor playing "Memory". I don't get to use the bathroom by myself and I usually don't get to enjoy a meal while sitting, let alone actually savor the food I'm eating. I'm not allowed to be sick and should a virus decide to rebel, I don't have a place to send my kids so I can recuperate. Most days, no matter how many times I vacuum or sweep nothing looks clean and enduring two children in the throes of temper tantrums can be more than overwhelming, but on the plus side I'm not rushed or confined to a certain schedule aside from my son's school and extracurriculars, which are few. I don't have deadlines. I can do my "job" in my pajama's or I can put on make-up and do my hair, my choice. Most importantly, I get to be constantly involved in my children's activities, which can be a blessing and a curse depending on the day. It didn't always feel like this. I would tell people my husband would "never understand just what I do during the day." I'm pretty sure I used the infamous Bon Bon and soap opera line many times. It took a lot of exposure and practice to make staying at home an enjoyable privilege. Yes, I'm still tired most days both at the beginning and the end, and I don't always love my life but I've stopped condemning it. It is not the unexplored level of hell in which I once convinced myself I existed. I've gotten to know my kids very well and we've all begun working as a mostly cohesive unit. Again, I can't speak for all of us staysies. Every kid is different and so is every parent. As I sit here,admiring the tan lines from my watch and sandals...hard earned tan lines, gained through a week of heavy outdoor activity with my two kids who never slow down...I can't help but think of how awesome my job is and how lucky I am to have such manageable work, not to mention a great "office". Of course we are treading on Spring/Summer, which always makes the job that much easier AND likable. I'm pretty sure I'll be ready to quit once the cabin fever of Winter is upon us again.
